TWENTY FIFTEEN

A few days ago, I decided to clear my desk of unnecessary things and found my journal in one of the drawers. I started writing on it on January 1 and continued every day until May 15, simply because I had already grown lazy of manually writing entries. I then typed in everything else that happened in my life.

Reading my journal entries from the first half of the year made me realize how much things has changed for me. For one, I wrote in my very first entry that in 2015, I wanted to lose weight and shape my body into the way I desired it to be.

I almost did exactly that but my journey won't end this year. I have already lost 20 lbs. since August and am proud of myself for achieving so much within five months. My weight loss journey only included a diet. I tried to work out but a lot, as in a lot, happened that were related to academics that I didn't have time for it. I vowed to myself that I'll start the shaping part next year.

Another point was that I wanted to be better in photography. I'm not so sure with that part but I'm not so strict about it. This year, I believe I captured moments. I also resurrected my dying YouTube account by uploading video diaries. What I do know is that I haven't given up on it yet. I may have taken other hobbies but photography will surely be something that I'll hold on to. So I'll keep this point open until next year.

Lastly, I wrote there that I wanted to be happy. 2014 was a good year though--I had my ups and downs just like everybody else--but I wanted to be happier. That year, I was so anxious about a lot of things that before 2015 came, I put my foot down and told myself to get a grip.

The question is, was I happier this year?

Yes, yes I was.

I have so many things to be thankful for, so many people that I learned to love and appreciate, and did so many courageous things that my 2014 self would be afraid or jealous of. I embraced a part of me that I have kept hidden for a long time and I saw an image of myself that I don't even recognize anymore.

And it makes me happy that this year, I had actual control of my life without telling myself excuses that prevent me from doing the things that I wanted to do. I made myself kick out the fear and put myself out there. And I most definitely know that I matured, certain that my way of thinking has changed and that it's a good thing.

I know that all of this is just the beginning, that more wonders will come in 2016, and I am excited for whatever it is out there that's waiting for me.

Thank you, 2015, for being a great year!

For now, here's a collection of photos I have taken over the year.